15 weeks, 0 days

Time has flown by these last few weeks. I have been meaning to update all of you but the fatigue is kicking my behind. Plus I am still feeling a little nauseous!

Last week, when I was 14 weeks, 1 day I had an ultrasound. Unfortunately, the doctor was called out on an emergency, so I didn't get to talk to a doc, but that is why I got to come in today for a meeting with him. My scan went wonderfully. Baby is looking great, growing as he/she should be and heartbeat is strong and 158 beats per minute. It measured 8.58cm and that is a couple of days ahead of what should be and my cervix is the right length at 3.44 cm. I asked about my placenta and it appears to be growing normally along the right side and back of uterus with no potential weak spots visible. My left ovary is still enlarged and has multiple follicles on it, but they are decreasing in size. I asked the tech to make an educated guess about gender but she would not, saying that she feels she must be 99% sure of it before she says anything and at this age, no one can be that sure. I am so relieved that I made it through the first trimester without any problems. The doctor says I am out of the woods for an early loss and thinks that I still have only a 3-4% chance of placental abruption throughout the entire pregnancy. WHEW!!!Aww! Look how cute she/he is! I am in love already!!!! That white mark above her/his head is the baby waving...yep that is the hand! Hi there baby Plato~!

My weight has increased by 10 pounds since before pregnancy and I expressed my concern. The nurse didn't think this was a big deal but offered for me to speak with the dietitian. I accepted. Today I spoke with her and she set me on a plan that would be similar to if I in fact has gestational diabetes. I think I was doing fairly well anyway, but she gave me some materials and plans to follow which will make it easier when I want to eat more than I should. At least I will know that I am getting enough food for the baby without causing me grief. The dietitian reported that it was refreshing to her to see someone concerned about weight gain in pregnancy because she finds that most women don't seem to care and some even come in saying they've gained 70-80 pounds.

After the dietary consult, I was able to have a checkup with the doctor. Again my BP was low, 98/52 and the nurse listened to the fetal heart tones instead of ultrasound. 160-165 and she let me listen to it for a good 60 second. Smiling, she said, "isn't that the greatest sound in the world?!" I smiled back saying, "More than you know, after two years of trying, two miscarriages and 5 years after the death of my newborn."

Once the doctor came in, he said that my Nuchal Translucency results were negative. I have a very low chance for Down's or Trisomy 18, 1:26,000 for Down's and 1:14,000 for Tri 18. YAY! He explained that all is looking good and sent me on my way. I will have my next appointment June 2 at 2:40pm and that will be our anatomy ultrasound. I will know if he/she is one or the other! I cannot wait. I am not sure how I will be able to go 4 weeks without hearing little one's heartbeat, but I am hoping I can start to feel something more regularly soon. Oh, by the way, I am feeling the flutters a couple times a week now. Especially when I wake up on my belly. Must be he/she is trying to wake me up and tell me to get back on my side. It is so uncomfortable in my bed. And, I get my new, super-soft, (and medium soft on Shaun's side), King sized bed delivered tomorrow! I am so excited to spread out and be comfortable in my bed.

Anyway, being 15 weeks brings a bit of a relief to me. I got passed the first hurdle of loss. And I feel fairly confident that I can bring a live, healthy, term newborn home in 5 1/2 months. It seems so strange that everything is going well. I expected to have such adversity after all that I have been through. I wonder when the fear will return. I thought I would be so scared of a subsequent pregnancy. So far, I feel carefree. I am once again in awe of how God creates life within a human. It is utterly amazing when I look at the ultrasound pics and think that is my child I helped to create along with my husband and the LORD. I feel assured in God's provision and trust His plan. I am not a victim of my circumstance, I am a survivor of horrific things. I am here and I am able to tell about it. Oh, how I long to share success with all of you in months to come. Oh, praise His NAME!

Father, I thank you so much for continued good news at each visit. I pray that you continue to bless my child and me and give us strength to withstand this pregnancy. I pray for continued health and favor among us. Help me to show others who YOU are through this period in life and teach me to follow your ways.

I pray for my friends and family members who are pregnant. I pray for the one who is experiencing pain in her back and ask that you heal it with minimal intervention, so she can enjoy the pregnancy and do it again some day. I pray for the one who is also 15 weeks that her Gestational Diabetes is taken care of by diet and exercise alone, with no more need for medical intervention. I pray that her heart is healed too as she sometimes fears another loss. I pray for the one who is due in a couple of months, that she will have a swift, painless delivery and her little guy will be healthy. I pray for my friend who just found out she is having a little girl that her pregnancy continues to go smoothly! For all my other pregnant friends I pray for blessing. And for those still trying, or grieving the loss of their babies, I pray that you fill them with your love, your grace and your spirit. I ask all these things and more in JESUS' name, AMEN!